The Air That I Need
by Funky In Fishnet
Summary: Aurora misses Mulan, so does Philip. Their feelings for her are different but strong. They want her back in their lives.


_**Disclaimer:** I own nothing._

_**Author Note: **Set before episode 4x07 'The Snow Queen.'_

* * *

**THE AIR THAT I NEED**

There was so much to learn in Storybrooke, as well as Aurora's pregnancy to think about, that it took Aurora several days to realise something. She sat up sharply, her hand automatically coming to rest on her enlarged stomach, her baby stirring under her touch. Philip stirred beside her, then his eyes became bright and alert, his hand reaching for the sword that was always close at hand.

"My love?"

Aurora turned to him, her eyes shining, excitement and happiness flowing through her, "Mulan said she was joining Robin Hood's Merry Men."

Philip's expression cleared as he realised just as she had, "And Robin Hood is here, in Storybrooke."

Aurora grasped his hand tightly, "Mulan must be here too."

* * *

Aurora's friendship with Mulan had begun unevenly. She had noticed Mulan's regard for Philip and how well Philip had thought of Mulan, then Aurora had been preoccupied by grief after Philip had been struck down. She had not noticed how Mulan had bore it, how well she had treated Aurora as she'd assisted the princess in navigating the land now so different to the one Aurora had known. Mulan had been a good friend, even when in mourning herself, even when Aurora had not been kind to her, even when in love with the man that Aurora had grieved for.

She had held Aurora's heart in her hands and had put it back where it belonged. She had helped Aurora return Philip to his body, she done much knowing that Philip loved Aurora. Aurora had trusted Mulan through everything until one day Mulan had suddenly decided to leave. Her face had been so sad, so briefly devastated, before she had turned and walked away from Aurora. She hadn't even said goodbye to Philip.

Aurora had missed her friend, Mulan's quiet presence, how having Mulan beside her had made Aurora feel strong and sure. Philip had told her that Mulan had always made him feel the same way because he'd known that he could rely on her. So why had she left them? Aurora wished she knew.

When Zelena had taken control of the Enchanted Forest, sparing Aurora and Philip if they only did what she told them, Aurora had thought of Mulan and how she would have reacted in such a circumstance. Aurora had had another life to think of, the one growing within her, and she had not wanted to lose Philip again either. She had thought that maybe Mulan would have taken Zelena's offer if she had been there too. She had hoped that was what Mulan would have done.

Now, in Storybrooke, seeing Emma and Snow and Henry, Aurora missed Mulan even more. They weren't a complete family without Mulan, that was what they'd become in the Enchanted Forest. Surely Mulan had felt the same way? She had begun to smile more and had been such an integral part of their lives. Maybe she had still harboured deep affection for Philip in her heart, maybe seeing Philip with Aurora, hearing about their child, had become too much to bear. Maybe she had found another to think of so well.

Aurora found that such a thought prickled at her unpleasantly.

She wanted Mulan there when her child was born.

Philip kissed her and agreed.

* * *

It was not easy to locate Robin Hood. He had begun courting the Evil Queen, who was known as Regina now, but then his wife Marian was magically returned to him. Oh, Aurora knew that feeling well. But Robin did not look entirely happy, not as happy as Aurora and Philip had been when reunited, and Regina was clearly heartbroken. Aurora talked to Henry about it, he was worried about his mother and Aurora wished she could help him.

"You guys got your happy ending," Henry said, nodding towards Aurora and Philip. "My mom should get hers too."

According to Snow and Emma, Regina had done many terrible things but she had begun to change, for her son. Aurora watched Regina and Robin, how painful it was for them to talk to one another, how suspicious and hurt Robin's wife Marian was. Aurora tried to imagine living like that. She held Philip tight.

Was that what Mulan had lived through with them? Aurora felt awful.

If Mulan didn't want to live with that pain, then Aurora understood. She wanted Mulan close again but she did not want Mulan to be in that kind of pain. Aurora cared too much about her for that.

"I just want to see her," she told Philip one afternoon. "Does that make me selfish?"

Philip shook his head, "It makes you a good friend."

Aurora's smile was pained, "But I don't want to hurt her, did you...did you know, that she was in love with you?"

There was a silent pause, Aurora held her breath. She and Philip had never spoken about this before. It had seemed too delicate a thing to even approach. Mulan had never spoken of it and Aurora had felt protective of her friend, of the feelings she had hoarded for herself.

Philip sighed, looking tinged with sadness and regret, "Perhaps, I cannot say. I was consumed only with finding you; there was little else I spoke of. Everything else felt distant and unreal."

Then he smiled, very gently, "I always thought that perhaps she held most affection for you."

Aurora smiled back, "She is my dearest friend and close to my heart. I thought she had come to view me as a friend, not a burden but..."

Philip cupped her chin and drew her words to a close. His expression was soft and thoughtful in a way that made Aurora's breath catch. He spoke in a deliberate way as though imparting a vital message. Aurora tried hard to hear it.

"You didn't see how her eyes followed you or how she smiled for you."

Aurora shook her head but her mind whirled. Had Mulan smiled a certain way only for her? Had Mulan silently held Aurora close to her heart? As a friend or...Aurora's eyes widened, had they somehow split Mulan's heart in two? Had she held them both in strong affection? Oh, no wonder she had not stayed.

The two of them sat silently, fingers intertwined, lost in their thoughts.

* * *

That night, Aurora dreamed of petal-soft lips and hands callused from swordwork. She dreamed of supple arms and warm eyes and two very different smiles. She dreamed of love.

When she woke, Philip was watching her. Aurora kissed him with a desperation that she could not yet put into words. Philip's kisses contained the same rawness. What had he dreamed of?

* * *

Snow listened attentively when Aurora spilled out her worries. She looked a little shocked.

"I think it's not my...I think love's...surprising, especially in this town," Snow replied eventually. "My daughter's dating a pirate, one of the seven dwarves is in love with a fairy who's also a nun, and our librarian is married to Rumplestiltskin."

Aurora drank her tea, her free hand resting on her swollen belly. Snow quietened her fussing baby son and continued,

"If this is what you and Philip really want, you shouldn't give up, not until you know, one way or the other."

"I don't want to hurt Mulan."

"If she's here in Storybrooke, then she still cares about you. There's a whole world out there for her to lose herself in, if she'd wanted to."

* * *

Aurora thought about Mulan, she thought about how it'd felt when Mulan had held her heart in her hands, how much Aurora had trusted her. She thought about how much she had enjoyed Mulan's company, how frequently she still looked around for Mulan, to share a joke with her or a smile. She thought about how happy thinking of Mulan made her. Aurora thought about her dreams.

She wondered suddenly; if Mulan had kissed her, would she have woken from the sleeping spell? Or if Mulan had kissed Philip once he'd been reunited with his body, would he have awoken too?

* * *

Robin was preoccupied but Little John was able to speak with them. Aurora was filled with hope and excitement, as well as some strong fear. She had never expected this to happen but she couldn't stop it now. It all felt too inevitable, too important to let go of.

"A warrior called Mulan joined you in the Enchanted Forest," Aurora asked. "Is she here?"

Philip pressed a hand to her side but Aurora was close enough to feel how the hopeful beat of t his heart; because they might see Mulan again.

Little John didn't look happy. Had Mulan been talking about them? What had she said? Was she well?

"Please," Philip spoke, quiet but firm.

Aurora squeezed his hand. Little John's expression didn't change much but Aurora bent forward just a little, saying quietly, "We're not Marian, Regina or Robin."

That made Little John snort but he did lead them to the Merry Men's encampment. Aurora couldn't see Mulan anywhere or any indication that she'd even been there. There was a little boy – Roland, Robin and Marian's son – playing with a man in monk's robes, and a fire crackling for warmth and food.

"Try the town's boundaries," Little John told them.

Aurora thanked him and walked hand-in-hand with Philip for breathless moments, through the trees. Philip then slowed his steps, pulling Aurora to a stop.

"Some words can't be forgotten," he warned her quietly.

Aurora bit her lip, "I know."

Because Mulan hadn't said anything, likely so how she felt hadn't changed anything. Aurora drew closer to Philip, pressing a hand to her heart.

"But what I, we, feel is important, what Mulan felt was so important that she left us."

Philip didn't challenge her words. Aurora knew him well; she could read his expression easily – he cared for Mulan, in a way different to how he felt about Aurora but enough for him to be there, stepping towards whatever this turned out to be. Philip's expression became cautious.

"But if she wishes to stay away, we cannot force her to do otherwise."

They could not. Aurora felt a deep aching pang. Her child kicked.

* * *

On the outskirts of Storybrooke, there was nothing but greenery and shadows. Despair and frustration flooded Aurora, Philip's brow creased and he wrapped a comforting arm around her before stilling completely. Aurora glanced at him.

"What is it?"

Philip looked hopeful, "We're being watched."

Aurora peered eagerly into the shadows, hoping to spy a recognisable figure. She thought through what Mulan had taught her about tracking, about being aware of her surroundings and what could lurk in them. She almost held her breath.

She thought she heard a footfall and turned immediately towards the sound. She exchanged a meaningful glance with Philip. She couldn't move as quickly as before, thanks to the precious life now growing inside of her. How she wished she could run in that moment.

She still had her voice though, "Mulan, we...we miss you."

There was only silence in reply and Aurora felt something choke her throat. Had they hurt Mulan so badly? Did she no longer care for them? Philip brushed a kiss to Aurora's temple before raising his own voice.

"There's a place for you here with us, Mulan, a place that you and I both desire, with Aurora."

Aurora turned to him at that, surprised, but Philip only smiled, warm and sure. Her heart beating fast, Aurora found her voice again, "_Please,_ Mulan."

The following silence was taut but Aurora could hear a footfall, then another. Then a gloved hand clasped Aurora's and Aurora felt as though she could breathe again at last. The silence was perfect after that.

* * *

When Aurora gave birth, it was in a large building full of light and noise. A man in a white coat was in charge; Emma, Hook, David and Snow among others waited nearby for news. Sometimes Aurora opened her eyes and saw a straight-backed figure stood at the doorway, guarding Aurora, Philip and the child so soon to arrive in this strange world. Sometimes the figure was closer. Philip was always at her side. Aurora felt surrounded by strength and love. Her child evidently wished to be too.

Aurora cried and felt two pairs of callused hands guiding her on and holding her heart.

_-the end_


End file.
